On the Tab :: Dec. 19 - 26

Year-end events are either a flurry of Santa-themed fun or a desolate, "We're Closed" dormancy. While many bars and restaurants will be open for those who won't be leaving town or perching couchward at family gatherings, so few of them bothered to tell us (putting them on our Naughty list). You'll have to ring up your preferred tavern to see if they too, will have flown the coop.

Thursday, Dec. 19

Alaska Thunderfuck
The wacky RuPaul's Drag Race finalist performs her holiday show, Happy Birthday, Baby Jesus. $22-$40. 7:30 & 10:30pm. Also Dec. 20. 1760 Market St. www.alaskathunderfuck.com www.brownpapertickets.com

Comedy Thursdays @ Esta Noche
The revamped weekly LGBT- and queer-friendly comedy night at the Mission club is hosted by various comics (1st Thu, Natasha Muse; 2nd Thu, Emily Van Dyke; 3rd Thu Eloisa Bravo and Kimberly Rose; 4th Thu Johan Miranda). No cover; one-drink min. 8pm. 307916th St. www.comedybodega.com

Fuego @ The Watergarden, San Jose
Weekly event, with Latin music, half-off locker fees and Latin men, at the South Bay private men's bath house. $8-$39. Reg hours 24/7. 18+. 1010 The Alameda. (408) 275-1215. www.thewatergarden.com

Greg Adams & East Bay Soul @ Yoshi's
Enjoy a Sweet Soul Christmas concert with the R&B funk band. $25. 8pm. 1330 Fillmore St. 655-5600. www.yoshis.com

Gym Class @ Hi Tops
Enjoy cheap/free whiskey shots from jock-strapped hotties and sexy sports videos at the popular new sports bar. 10pm-2am. 2247 Market St. 551-2500. www.HiTopsSF.com

Holiday Block Party @ 5M Project
Enjoy drinks, art, music, crafts and games as local galleries and tech companies cohost a block party. $7-$15. 7pm-11pm. Mary St. between 5th and 6th. www.holiday-block-party.eventbrite.com

Jukebox @ Beatbox
Veteran DJ Page Hodel (The Box, Q and many other events) presents a new weekly dance event, with soul, funk, hip-hop and house mixes. $10. 21+. 9pm-2am. 314 11th St. at Folsom. www.BeatboxSF.com

Katya Smirnoff-Skyy @ Feinstein's at the Nikko
Our favorite Russian exiled countess revives her vodka-soaked holiday spectacular cabaret show. $25-$30. $20 food/beverage minimum. 8pm. Hotel Nikko, 222 Mason St. (866) 663-1063. www.feinsteinssf.com

Magic Parlor @ Chancellor Hotel
Whimsical Belle Epoque-style sketch and magic show that also includes historical San Francisco stories; hosted by Walt Anthony; optional pre-show light dinner and desserts. $40. Thu-Sat 8pm. 433 Powell St. www.SFMagicParlor.com

The Monster Show @ The Edge
Cookie Dough's weekly drag show with gogo guys and hilarious fun. $5. 9pm-2am. 4149 18th St. at Collingwood. www.edgesf.com

Nightlife @ California Academy of Sciences
Themed event nights at the fascinating nature museum, with DJed dancing, cocktails, fish, frogs, food and fun. $10-$12. 6pm-10pm, 55 Music Concourse Drive, Golden Gate Park. 379-8000. www.calacademy.org

Pan Dulce @ The Caf�
Amazingly hot Papi gogo guys, cheap drinks and fun DJed dance music. Free before 10pm. $5 til 2am. 2369 Market St. www.clubpapi.com www.cafesf.com

Piaf: Her Story, Her Songs @ Roxie
French jazz singer Raquel Bitton hosts a gala screening of the documentary about Edith Piaf. $25. $40 VIP ticket includes champagne, an open wine bar and food, plus prizes and gift baskets for a few attendees. Proceeds benefit the French Cinema Club. 8:15pm. 3117 16th St. www.roxie.com

Thursday Night Live @ SF Eagle
The weekly live rock shows have returned. 9pm-ish. 398 12th St. at Harrison. www.sf-eagle.com

Tony! Toni! Ton� @ Yoshi's Oakland
The stylish R&B trio performs a series of concerts. $34-$39. Thu & Fri 8pm & 10pm. Sat 7:30 & 9:30pm. Sun 7pm & 9pm. 510 Embarcadeo West, Jack London Square, Oakland. (510) 238-9200. www.yoshis.com

Tubesteak Connection @ Aunt Charlie's Lounge
Enjoy the intimate groovy disco night with DJ Bus Station John. $7. 10pm-2am. 133 Turk St. at Taylor. www.auntcharlieslounge.com

Underwear Party @ Powerhouse
Strip down to your skivvies at the weekly cruisy SoMa bar night. 10pm-2am. 1347 Folsom St. www.powerhouse-sf.com

VIP @ Club 21, Oakland
Hip Hop, Top 40, and sexy Latin music; gogo dancers, appetizers, and special guest DJs. No cover before 11pm and just $5 after all night. Dancing 9pm-3am.
Happy hour 4pm-8:30pm 2111 Franklin St. (510) 268-9425. www.club21oakland.com

Friday, Dec. 20

Bad Girl Cocktail Hour @ The Lexington Club
Every Friday night, bad girls can get $1 dollar margaritas between 9pm and 10pm. 3464 19th St. between Mission and Valencia. 863-2052. www.lexingtonclub.com

Count Basie Orchestra @ Yoshi's
Grammy-winning jazz orchestra, continued after Basie's passing, play classic music by the composer and bandleader. $29-$35. 8pm & 10pm. Also Dec. 21. 1330 Fillmore St. 655-5600. www.yoshis.com

Fedorable @ El Rio
Free weekly queer dance party, with gogos, prizes, old groovy tunes, cheap cocktails. 9pm-2am. 3158 Mission St. 282-3325. www.elriosf.com

Friday Nights @ De Young Museum
Season 9 of the popular weekly early evening museum parties continues, with live music and performance, exhibit-themed workshops and food and drinks. 5pm-8:30pm. Golden Gate Park, 50 Hagiwara Tea Garden Drive. 750-3600. www.famsf.org

Go-Beaux @ Beaux
Gogo-tastic weekly night at the new Castro club. Bring your dollahs, 'cause they'll make you holla. 9pm-2am. 2344 Market St. www.beauxsf.com

Happy Friday @ Midnight Sun
Open during renovations, the popular video bar ends each week with gogo guys (starting at 9pm) and drink specials. 4067 18th St. 861-4186. www.midnightsunsf.com

Hard @ Qbar
DJ Haute Toddy spins electro beats; cute gogo guys shake it. $3. 9pm-2am. 456 Castro St. www.QbarSF.com

Holiday Hardbox @ Powerhouse
Steve Fabus spins classic disco, Abada and Maxfit hunks do martial arts and capoeira demos, and the regular cruisiness continues. 10pm-2am. 1347 Folsom St. www.powerhouse-sf.com

Holiday Cabaret @ Hotel Rex
Society Cabaret presents G. Scott Lacy's piano concert with special guests Sophisticated Ladies (8pm), Barry Lloyd (Dec. 21, 8pm) and Christopher M. Nelson (Dec. 22, 2pm). $20-$40. Cocktail and small dish menu. 562 Sutter St. 857-1896. www.societycabaret.com

Josh Klipp and The Klipptones @ Palace Hotel
The local jazz crooner and his band perform weekly shows at the hotel's lounge, which draws a growing swing-dance audience. 7pm-11pm. 2 New Montgomery. www.joshklipp.com

LaChanze @ Feinstein's at the Nikko
Broadways celebrated powerhouse vocalist and Tony Award winner (The Color Purple) performs Love Hangover: Lachanze Sings Diana Ross, her cabaret musical tribute to The Supremes diva. $30-$50. $20 food/beverage minimum. Also Dec. 21. Hotel Nikko, 222 Mason St. (866) 663-1063. www.ticketweb.com

Latin Explosion @ Club 21, Oakland
Eight bars, more dance floors, and a smoking lounge; the largest gay Latin dance night in the Bay Area. Happy hour 4pm-8:30pm. Dancing 9pm-4am. 2111 Franklin St. (510) 268-9425. www.club21oakland.com

Picante @ Esta Noche
Weekly show with drag queens and the Picante Boys; hosted by Lulu Ramirez; DJ Marco. 9pm-2am. 3079 16th St. 841-5748. www.jceventssf.com

Release @ Club OMG
Weekly party at the intimate mid-Market club; rotating hosts and DJs, Top 40 dance remixes, giveaways, gogo hunks. Free before 11pm. $3. 9pm-2am. 43 Sixth St. www.clubomgsf.com www.facebook.com/ReleaseSF

Solstice in Stereo @ The Chapel
KALX presents a night of dreamy and danceable rock music with local bands Foxtails Brigade, The Seshen and Farallons. $12-$14. 9pm. 777 Valencia St. www.thechapelsf.com

Some Thing
Mica Sigourney and pals' weekly offbeat drag performance night; Gina LaDivina's 65th birthday party. 10pm-2am. 399 9th St. www.studsf.com

Saturday, Dec. 21

Beach Blanket Babylon @ Club Fugazi
The musical comedy revue celebrates its 40th year with an ever-changing lineup of political and pop culture icons, all in gigantic wigs. Holiday shows, including tap-dancing Christmas trees and more thematic characters, now on sale. $25-$160. Wed & Thu, 5pm* (* = under 21 allowed) & 8pm (also Dec 26). Fri & Sat 6:30* & 9:30pm. Sun 2pm* & 5pm*. Christmas Eve special 2pm*. New Year's Eve 7pm & 10:15pm (with champagne). Beer/wine served; cash only; 21+, except where noted. 678 Beach Blanket Babylon Blvd (Green St.). 421-4222. http://beachblanketbabylon.com/when/Holidayschedule%202013.shtml

Beer Bust @ Hole in the Wall Saloon
Beer only $8 until you bust. 4pm-8pm. 1369 Folsom St. 431-4695. www.hitws.com

Bootie SF @ DNA Lounge
Weekly mash-up dance night, with resident DJs Adrian & Mysterious D. No matter the theme, a mixed fun good time's assured. $8-$15. 9pm-3am. 21+. 375 11th st. at Harrison. www.BootieSF.com www.DNAlounge.com

La Bota Loca @ Club 21, Oakland
Xmas party with Pancho Claus, plus DJed tunes, gogo hotties, drag shows, drink specials, all at Oakland's premiere Latin nightclub and weekly cowboy night. $10-$15. Dancing 9pm-4am. 2111 Franklin St. (510) 268-9425. www.club21oakland.com

Club Rimshot @ Bench and Bar, Oakland
Weekly hip hop and R&B night. $8-$15. 9pm to 4am. 510 17th St. www.bench-and-bar.com

Evolution @ Beatbox
Alexander DJs the Timmy Scott dance party. $10-$30. 10pm-4am. 314 11th St. www.beatboxsf.com

Kink Salon, Beat Pig @ Powerhouse
Show off your kinkiest gear at the early evening event, 6pm-9pm. Then, Juanita More and pals' monthly night provides grooves and elfin gogo hunks. Donate gift cards and unwrapped new toys for needy kids. $5. 10pm-2am. 1347 Folsom St. www.powerhouse-sf.com

Magic Show @ Hotel Rex
Old-fashioned magic show with Sebastian Boswell III, Adam Sachs and guest performers, weekly in the parlor of the elegant downtown hotel. Two-drink min. Light fare menu. Saturdays thru 2013. $25-$30. 8pm. 562 Sutter St. 895-0090. www.MagicattheRex.com

Raid Zero @ Temple
Electronic music dance night and winter solstice celebration. 21+. 10pm-2am. 540 Howard St. www.templesf.com

Sunday, Dec. 22

Beer Bust @ SF Eagle
The classic leather bar is back, with the most popular Sunday daytime event in town. 3pm-6pm (Also now open daily 11am-2am). 398 12th St. at Harrison. www.sf-eagle.com

Brunch @ Hi Tops
Enjoy crunchy sandwiches and mimosas, among other menu items, at the popular sports bar. 2247 Market St. 551-2500. www.HiTopsSF.com

Christmas With the Celts @ Yoshi's
Nashville-based Irish-Scottish band performs traditional Celtic holiday music. $28-$47. 2pm and 6pm. 1330 Fillmore St. 655-5600. www.yoshis.com

Dave Koz and Friends @ The Warfield
The popular jazz saxophonist performs his Christmas Tour concert with vocalists Oleta Adams, Jonathan Butler and pianist Keiko Matsui. $39-$125. VIP meet and greet $50 extra. 8pm. 982 Market St. 673-4653. www.davekoz.com www.axs.com

Full of Grace @ Beaux
New weekly night with hostess Grace Towers, different local and visiting DJs, and pop-up drag performances. This week, DJ Robin Simmons. No cover. 9pm-2am. 2344 Market St. www.beauxsf.com

Jackie Beat @ Rebel
LA's caustically funny drag queen performs her new show of song parodies, Oh, Holy Hell. $26. 7pm & 9pm. 1760 Market St. www.brownpapertickets.com

Jason Brock @ Martuni's
Our powerhouse crooner performs a special holiday show at the intimate martini bar's back room cabaret. $25. 4pm & 7pm. 4 Valencia St. at Market. http://jbholiday.bpt.me/

Norman Vane @ Martuni's
Enjoy some holiday musical madness as the veteran cabaret pianist-singer is joined by Ethel Merman, Jesse Cortez and Joe Wicht (aka Mrs. Trauma Flintstone as they perform all the songs on Barbra Streisand's Christmas Album, again! $7. 7pm. 4 Valencia St.

Salsa Sundays @ El Rio
Salsa dancing for LGBT folks and friends, with live merengue and cumbia bands; tapas and donations that support local causes. 2nd & 4th Sundays. 3pm-8pm. 3158 Mission St. 282-3325. www.elriosf.com

Sundance Saloon @ Space 550
The popular country western LGBT dance night celebrates a decade and a half of fun foot-stomping two-stepping and line-dancing. $5. 5pm-10:30pm with lessons from 5:30-7:15 pm. Also Thursdays. 550 Barneveld Ave., and Tuesdays at Beatbox, $6. 6:30-11pm. 314 11th St. www.sundancesaloon.org

Sunday's a Drag @ Starlight Room
Donna Sachet hosts the weekly fabulous brunch and drag show. December shows A Miracle on Powell Street, take on a holiday theme. $45. 11am, show at noon; 1:30pm, show at 2:30pm. 450 Powell St. in Union Square. 395-8595. www.starlightroomsf.com

Tea Rex @ Beatbox
Corey Craig DJs the daytime dance party. $5-$10. 4pm-8pm. 314 11th St. www.beatboxsf.com

Monday, Dec. 23

Cock and Bull Mondays @ Hole in the Wall Saloon
Specials on drinks made with Cock and Bull ginger ale (Jack and Cock, Russian Mule, and more). 8pm-closing. 1369 Folsom St. 431-4695. www.hitws.com

Karaoke @ The Lookout
Paul K hosts the amateur singing night. 8pm-2am. 3600 16th St. at Market. www.lookoutsf.com

Monday Musicals @ The Edge
The casts of local and visiting musical soften pop in to performs at the popular Castro bar's musical theatre night. 7pm-2am. 2 for 1 cocktail, 5pm-closing. 18th St. at Collingwood. www.edgesf.com

Natasha Miller @ Yoshi's
The local singer performs songs from her new CD, The Secret of Christmas. $16-$20. 8pm. 1330 Fillmore St. 655-5600. www.yoshis.com

Piano Bar 101 @ Martuni's
Sing-along night with talented locals, and charming accompanist Joe Wicht (aka Trauma Flintstone). 9pm. 4 Valencia St. at Market. www.dragatmartunis.com

Sports Night @ The Eagle
The legendary leather bar gets jock-ular, with beer buckets, games (including beer pong and corn-hole!), prizes, sports on the TVs, and more fun. 398 12th St. at Harrison. www.sf-eagle.com

Tuesday, Dec. 24

13 Licks @ Q Bar
Weekly women's night at the stylish intimate bar. 9pm-2am. 456 Castro St. www.QbarSF.com

Block Party @ Midnight Sun
Weekly screenings of music videos, concert footage, interviews and more, of popular pop stars. 9pm-2am. 4067 18th St. 861-4186. www.midnightsunsf.com

Bombshell Betty & Her Burlesqueteers @ Elbo Room
The weekly burlesque show of women dancers shaking their bonbons includes live music. $10. 9pm. 647 Valencia St. 552-7788. www.elbo.com

Clairdee @ Yoshi's
The talented jazz vocalist performs her annual Christmas Eve show, with guest performer ocmic magician Jay Alexander. $20. 8pm. 1330 Fillmore St. 655-5600. www.yoshis.com

Funny Tuesdays @ Harvey's
Ronn Vigh hosts the weekly LGBT and gay-friendly comedy night. One-drink or menu item minimum. 9pm. 500 Castro St. at 18th. 431-HARV. www.harveyssf.com

Ink & Metal @ Powerhouse
Show off your tattoos and piercings at the weekly cruisy SoMa bar night. 10pm-2am. 1347 Folsom St. www.powerhouse-sf.com

Kung Pao Kosher Comedy @ New Asia Restaurant
The 21st annual comedy and dinner nights feature Gary Gulman, Adrianne Tolsch, Samson Koletkar and hostess Lisa Geduldig. $44-$64. 6pm seven-course dinner shows, 9:30pm cocktail shows with vegetarian dim sum. Partial proceeds benefit SF and Marin food banks and the SF Jewish Home. Thru Dec. 26 (yes, including Christmas Eve and Day). 772 Pacific Ave. www.koshercomedy.com

Soma Country @ Beatbox
Sundance Saloon's monthly SoMa two-stepping dance night now takes place every Tuesday. $8. 8pm-12am. Lessons 8pm. 314 11th St. at Folsom. www.sundancesaloon.org www.beatboxsf.com

Torch @ Martuni's
Veronica Klaus hosts the weekly night of cabaret, jazz and blues music, with Tammy L. Hall and special guests. $15. 7pm. 4 Valencia St. at Market. www.facebook.com/veronica.klaus

Trivia Night @ Hi Tops
Play the trivia game at the popular new sports bar. 9pm. 2247 Market St. 551-2500. www.HiTopsSF.com

Wednesday, Dec. 25 - Christmas Day

Black Xmass @ Elbo Room
Celebrate the rockin' holidays with Bite, Death medicine Band, Theremin wizard Barney and Kitten on the Keys, with the Devil Dancers. $10. 9pm. 647 Valencia St. 552-7788. www.elbo.com

Holiday Dinner @ Ritz-Carlton
Enjoy an elegant four-course dinner prepared by Chef Michael Rotondo; groups up to ten welcome (20 in private dining room). $95 adults, $45 kids. 12pm-8pm. 600 Stockton St. 773-6158. www.ritzcarlton.com

Thursday, Dec. 26

Gym Class @ Hi Tops
Enjoy cheap/free whiskey shots from jock-strapped hotties and sexy sports videos at the popular new sports bar. 10pm-2am. 2247 Market St. 551-2500. www.HiTopsSF.com

Pan Dulce @ The Caf�
Enjoy amazingly hot Papi gogo guys, cheap drinks and fun DJed dance music. Free before 10pm. $5 til 2am. 2369 Market St. www.clubpapi.com www.cafesf.com

The Monster Show @ The Edge
Cookie Dough's weekly drag show with gogo guys. 9pm-2am. 4149 18th St. at Collingwood. www.edgesf.com

Tubesteak Connection @ Aunt Charlie's Lounge
Retro disco tunes and a fun diverse crowd, each Thursday; DJ Bus Station John plays records. $4. 10pm-2am. 133 Turk St. at Taylor. www.auntcharlieslounge.com

Underwear Party @ Powerhouse
Enjoy special 'Dick the Halls' post-Christmas fun; strip down to your skivvies at the weekly cruisy SoMa bar night. 10pm-2am. 1347 Folsom St. www.powerhouse-sf.com

VIP @ Club 21, Oakland
Hip-hop, Top 40, and sexy Latin music; gogo dancers, appetizers, and special guests. No cover before 11pm and just $5 afterward. Dancing 9pm-3am. Happy hour 4pm-8:30pm 2111 Franklin St. (510) 268-9425. www.club21oakland.com

Want your nightlife event listed? Still taping posters to telephone poles? Nobody reads those. Email [email protected], at least two weeks before your event. Event photos welcome.